Beware of cannibalism and false mountings...

As you may know I live in a very multicultural city. This can be really neat at times, or frustrating or irritating or it can also be a vast source of amusement. Take for instance the language barriers and things like trying to explain to 3 Asian girls on the bus what "oopsy daisy" means. Hell I don’t even know if that’s the way to spell it. And I have to admire someone who comes to a foreign country and opens a business. You either have to be very brave or utterly clueless, I am not sure which. Maybe a little of both.

Now there’s this nice Asian guy who owns a counter at the food court across the street from work. It’s a Mexican/sandwich place cuz god knows people from other countries can hardly ever stick with just one thing. There’s a Filipino place near me called appropriately enough Fiesta Filipino! It’s a grocery store/video rental/hair and nail salon. (they sell fish flavoured potato chips because who doesn’t ever crave the taste of fish during late night snacking time? Or when you are PMSing…oh yeah fuck chocolate, it’s fish all the way baby!) So anyway, back to the guy across from work. He makes party trays of sandwiches which works well for us since we often have a lot of meetings and such. So one time one of the girls got his business card. It actually said, underneath the name of the business, “homemade soups and FLESH sandwiches”. I am trying to figure out if the guy who printed them was also Asian and had no idea, or if he knew but simply snickered when the order was placed, rationalizing that he’s giving him exactly what he asked for. I am wondering if he found a sharp drop in business after he started handing those puppies out?

The other day we all got pedometers at work. (made it China of course cuz what isn’t?) It didn’t take long for someone to point out the instructions that were on a small piece of paper that came along with them.

“Mounting: Attach device securely to your waistband or belt, close to the center of your body. False mounting will possibly arouse inaccurate results.”

Yes that’s exactly what it says word for word. At this point I am looking for the button that sets the thing to vibrating and wondering how on earth you can mount something so small. Or maybe if I read further down the instructions there will be a website from where I can order all sorts of erotic attachments. Walking could never be the same again!

All that got me to remembering this little news story from way back, yes ladies, remember those Passion Pants?

click here for Passion Pants

I won’t be blogging again til next week. My friend is coming in town to visit, so we can plan, plan, and plan for our trip. Drinking profusely WILL be in there somewhere I am quite certain. We’ll need something to wash those fish flavoured chips down…..